It was 6:47 PM on a Tuesday, and I was lying facedown on the living room carpet, contemplating whether I’d ever have the energy to stand up again. My three-year-old was tugging at my shirt, begging me to play “chase” for the fifteenth time that day. My body screamed “no,” but my mom-guilt screamed louder. Then my husband walked in, grabbed a marker, drew a road on his white T-shirt, handed our daughter a toy car, and lay down next to me. She squealed with delight, rolling the car up and down his back while he closed his eyes and smiled.
That’s when I discovered horizontal parenting—and honestly, it changed everything.
If you’re a mom who’s ever wished you could freeze time for just five minutes of rest while your kids are awake, keep reading. This isn’t about being lazy—it’s about working smarter, not harder. And trust me, your kids will love it just as much as you do.
What Is Horizontal Parenting, Really?
Horizontal parenting is exactly what it sounds like: finding creative ways to keep your kids entertained and engaged with you while you’re lying down. The term was coined by author Michelle Woo in her 2021 book, Horizontal Parenting: How to Entertain Your Kid While Lying Down. But let’s be honest—moms have been doing versions of this forever. We just finally have a name for it now.
The concept went viral thanks to a TikTok video by Elkey Zandstra, a Seattle mom who filmed her husband, William, entertaining their two young kids while flat on his back. The video racked up over 2 million views and 240,000 likes. Why? Because parents everywhere immediately recognized the genius of it.
Here’s what makes horizontal parenting different from just “being a lazy parent” (we’ll address that criticism later): it requires creativity, preparation, and active participation. You’re not ignoring your kids or sticking them in front of a screen. You’re fully engaged—you just happen to be lying down while you do it.
Why I Desperately Needed This
Let me paint you a picture of my life before I discovered this hack. By 5 PM every single day, I was running on fumes. Between the morning routine chaos, work deadlines, meal prep, and the never-ending cycle of picking up toys, I was completely tapped out and worn down. Yet there were my kids, bright-eyed and ready for “quality playtime.”
The guilt was crushing. I wanted to be present for them, but my body literally couldn’t keep up with another round of tag or pretend restaurant. Some days, I’d force myself to play while secretly counting down the minutes until bedtime. Other days, I’d cave and turn on the TV, then beat myself up about it later.
Sound familiar? You’re not alone. According to experts at the American Academy of Pediatrics, parental burnout is real, and finding ways to rest while staying connected with your kids is actually crucial for your mental health.
That’s where horizontal parenting saved me. It gave me permission to take care of myself while still being the mom I wanted to be.
The Benefits That Actually Shocked Me
When I first tried horizontal parenting, I expected to get some physical rest. What I didn’t expect was how much it would benefit my kids, too. Here’s what happened:
I Could Finally Breathe
Lying down while playing with my kids meant my back got a break, my feet stopped aching, and I could actually relax my shoulders for the first time all day. One dad, Steven Bates from New Jersey, told the New York Post that horizontal parenting helps him manage his back spasms while still being an engaged father. He’s 40 and found that “lying down, they’re climbing on me, and we’re connecting—it’s a win for everyone.”
My Kids Got More Creative
Because horizontal parenting games require a bit of imagination, my kids started coming up with their own variations. They’d create new rules, invent storylines, and problem-solve on their own. Michelle Woo, the author who literally wrote the book on this, says it “fosters creativity in children” while giving parents a mental health boost.
It Became Our Special Thing
My kids now ask for “floor time” every evening. Steven Bates shared that he hopes his children will always treasure these horizontal parenting moments: “We’re nurturing special bonding moments with them every day. As they grow older, they’ll always remember this one-on-one time with us.”
It’s Accessible for Everyone
One of the most beautiful things I learned about horizontal parenting is how it’s become a game-changer for parents with chronic pain, disabilities, or limited mobility. Comments on the viral TikTok video showed parents with conditions like POTS (Postural Orthostatic Tachycardia Syndrome) and chronic fatigue celebrating this as a way they could finally engage fully with their kids. One commenter shared: “My husband has debilitating chronic pain. It limits his ability to play with our baby. These are actually life-changing ways he could interact and play with our child!”
If you’re looking for other ways to connect with your kids while managing your energy levels, check out these soft parenting techniques that emphasize gentle, responsive approaches.
15 Horizontal Parenting Ideas That My Kids Actually Love
Ready for the good stuff? Here are the games and activities that work in our house. Some require a tiny bit of prep, but trust me, it’s worth it.
1. Car Track T-Shirt Massage
Draw a road on the back of an old white T-shirt with a marker. Lie facedown while your kids “drive” toy cars or a back massager along the track. You get a massage, they get entertainment. Genius.
2. Whack-a-Mole Extravaganza
This one takes some setup but pays off big time. Create a cardboard platform with holes, lie underneath it, and pop stuffed animals up through the holes while your kids whack them with pool noodles. William Zandstra perfected this, and it’s become a fan favorite.
3. Human Paper Doll
Cut out felt “clothing” pieces—shirts, pants, hats, mustaches—and let your kids dress you up while you lie still like a life-sized paper doll. It’s hilarious and requires zero energy on your part.
4. The Storytime Snuggle
Grab a stack of books, lie down with your kiddos, and read together. Bonus points if you let them “read” to you while you rest your eyes.
5. Treasure Hunt Coach
Stay planted in one spot and send your kids on missions to find specific items around the house. “Can you bring me something red? Now something soft!” They run around, you stay horizontal.
If your kids love active games like this, you might also enjoy these fun outdoor activities for kids for when you have a bit more energy.
6. Beauty Salon or Barber Shop
Lie down and let your kids brush your hair, put clips in it, or even do your makeup. One mom commented on the viral video: “My daughter used to play funeral home makeup with me. She made me lie with my arms crossed over my chest and my eyes closed, and I couldn’t talk while she did my makeup. After a while, I started suggesting it when I was tired.”
7. The Toy Toss
Play with soft balls or plushies by tossing them around while you’re lying down. Kids bring them back to you, and you toss again. It’s basically fetch, but they love it.
8. Floor Art Studio
Set up coloring books, crayons, or craft supplies on the floor next to you and create art together while horizontal. For more creative activities, these kids’ craft supplies are perfect for keeping little hands busy during floor time.
9. Night, Night Reverse Bedtime
Let your kids put you to bed. They read you a story, tuck you in, kiss your forehead, and tell you “sweet dreams.” It’s adorable and gives you a legitimate excuse to close your eyes.
10. Tic-Tac-Toe T-Shirt
Draw a tic-tac-toe grid on a shirt and use small toys or magnets as game pieces. Kids can play on your back while you relax.
11. How Tall Am I?
Have your child measure your height using household items like cereal boxes, books, or toys. They line them up next to you and estimate. It’s educational and requires no effort from you.
12. Hide and Seek-ish
Instead of hiding yourself, stay put and have your kids hide while you guess their locations. “Are you behind the couch? Under the table?” They giggle, you rest.
13. Puzzle Relay Race
Put puzzle pieces in a basket, place the frames across the room, and hand out pieces one at a time while kids run back and forth. You’re the command center; they do the running.
14. Lasagna Game
Pile blankets and pillows on top of you and your kids on the couch, then everyone “sizzles to cook” like lasagna. It’s weird, it’s silly, and kids absolutely love it.
15. Doctor’s Office
Lie down as the “patient” and let your kids examine you with a toy doctor kit. They get to practice empathy and caregiving, while you get to lie completely still. You can find great developmental milestone books that teach kids about bodies and health during this type of play.
Making It Work for Different Ages
One thing I learned fast: not every horizontal parenting activity works for every age. Here’s what’s worked best for us:
Toddlers (Ages 1-3)
Keep it simple with peekaboo, singing songs, reading board books, and the car track T-shirt game. Toddlers love repetition, so prepare to do the same thing 47 times in a row.
Looking for more toddler-friendly activities? These toddler board games are perfect for this age group.
Preschoolers (Ages 3-5)
This is the sweet spot for horizontal parenting. Try learning games like color and shape identification, simple crafts, beauty shop, and storytelling. Preschoolers have enough imagination to really run with these ideas.
Older Kids (Ages 5+)
Ramp up the complexity with scavenger hunts, competitions, storytelling with plot twists, and even simple board games played while you’re lying down. If you’re looking for age-appropriate games, check out these board games for kids that work great during horizontal parenting sessions.
Let’s Address the “Is It Lazy?” Question
I knew this was coming. When the horizontal parenting video first went viral, some people called it lazy parenting. Let me be very clear: horizontal parenting is NOT lazy.
Here’s why:
First, it requires planning and creativity. William Zandstra didn’t just plop down on the floor and ignore his kids. He created elaborate cardboard structures, designed custom T-shirts, and actively engaged with his children. That’s the opposite of lazy.
Second, the article from Parents.com pointed out something interesting: would we be having this “lazy” conversation if it were a mom in the video instead of a dad? The writer questioned whether the reaction would have been as generous if a mother were doing horizontal parenting. Food for thought.
Third, rest is not the same as neglect. Taking care of yourself so you can be present for your kids is responsible parenting. As Michelle Woo explains, horizontal parenting provides “a boost in mental well-being for parents while fostering creativity in their children.” That’s a win-win.
Finally, for parents with chronic pain, disabilities, or health conditions, horizontal parenting isn’t lazy—it’s adaptive and necessary. It’s a way to stay connected with their kids when traditional active play isn’t possible.
If you’re interested in exploring different parenting approaches that prioritize connection and rest, read about permissive parenting and how it compares to other styles.
My Top Tips for Getting Started
Ready to try this yourself? Here’s what I wish I’d known from day one:
Prep Everything in Advance
Once you’re down on the floor, the last thing you want is to get up for supplies. Grab everything you need—toys, books, craft materials, snacks—and keep them within arm’s reach.
Choose Quiet, Soft Toys
The whole point is relaxation, right? Skip the noisy electronic toys and opt for softer, quieter options. Think plushies, wooden toys, books, and art supplies.
These reusable snack containers for kids are perfect to have nearby during floor time to keep everyone fueled without having to get up for snacks.
Make It Inclusive
If you have multiple kids, choose activities where everyone can participate. Turn things into competitions, have them take turns, or create collaborative games.
Set Time Boundaries
Horizontal parenting works best in manageable chunks. I usually do 20-30 minute sessions. It’s enough time to actually rest, but not so long that I get restless or the kids get bored.
Get the Right Products
While you don’t need anything fancy to start, a few tools can make it easier. Michelle Woo’s book Horizontal Parenting includes 50 activity ideas if you want more inspiration. You can also find racetrack T-shirts, doctor play kits, and other horizontal-parenting-friendly toys online.
For more structured activity ideas, these kids’ activity books & workbooks are fantastic for quiet floor time when you need your kids engaged while you rest.
Products That Make Horizontal Parenting Even Easier
While you absolutely don’t need special products to make this work, a few items can elevate your horizontal parenting game:
Michelle Woo’s Horizontal Parenting Book offers 50 creative games specifically designed for tired parents. It’s like having a cheat sheet for floor time.
Racetrack T-Shirts turn your back into an interactive play surface. Your kids get a toy to play with, and you get an impromptu massage.
Toy Doctor Kits are perfect for the patient/doctor game. Your kids practice caregiving skills while you lie still and “recover.”
Soft Building Blocks or Magnetic Tiles work great for floor play where kids build near you while you supervise horizontally.
Art Supply Caddies keep everything organized and within reach during floor art sessions. These 3-Layer Jumbo Arts and Crafts Supplies Warehouse organizers are perfect for this.
Real Talk: When It Works and When It Doesn’t
Let me be honest—horizontal parenting isn’t magic for every situation. There are times when my kids need me to be fully upright and active. When they’re melting down, when someone’s hurt, or when they genuinely need me to get down on their level (literally), I get up.
But for that post-dinner, pre-bedtime stretch when everyone’s fed and safe but still has energy to burn? Horizontal parenting is my secret weapon. It’s also perfect for:
- Weekend mornings when you desperately need five more minutes
- Recovery days when you’re sick or exhausted
- Rainy afternoons when everyone’s stuck inside
- The dreaded “witching hour” before bedtime
The key is knowing it’s one tool in your parenting toolbox, not the only tool.
FAQ: Everything You Asked About Horizontal Parenting
Is horizontal parenting bad for my kids?
Not at all. Horizontal parenting still involves active engagement, creativity, and quality time—you’re just doing it while lying down. As long as you’re supervising your kids and interacting with them, it’s a perfectly healthy way to play. In fact, experts note that parental well-being directly impacts children’s well-being, so taking care of yourself through rest-based activities benefits everyone.
At what age is best for horizontal parenting?
Horizontal parenting works best for kids aged 1-8, though the activities vary by age. Toddlers love simple games like peekaboo and songs. Preschoolers thrive with imaginative play, like a beauty shop and storytelling. Older kids enjoy more complex activities like scavenger hunts and competitions. The key is tailoring the activity to your child’s developmental stage.
How long should horizontal parenting sessions last?
Most parents find that 20-30 minute sessions work well. This gives you enough time to rest while keeping kids engaged. You can do multiple sessions throughout the day if needed. The Zandstra family incorporates it into their daily routine, especially during times when Dad needs to rest his back but still wants to connect with the kids.
Can I do horizontal parenting if I have multiple kids?
Absolutely. The key is choosing activities that engage everyone. Turn games into friendly competitions, have kids take turns, or select collaborative activities where they work together. The treasure hunt and puzzle relay race work particularly well with multiple children because they can race against each other.
What if people judge me for horizontal parenting?
This is a common concern, especially after some critics called it “lazy” online. Remember: you know what’s best for your family. If horizontal parenting helps you recharge while staying connected with your kids, that’s what matters. As one parent commented on the viral video, “You stumbled upon a need in our society, thank you for providing solutions.” You’re being resourceful and creative, not lazy.
For more insights on handling parenting judgment and finding your own style, explore these parenting quotes that remind us we’re all doing our best.
The Bottom Line
Horizontal parenting didn’t just give me permission to rest—it gave me a way to be present with my kids even when my body was running on empty. Is it perfect? No. Will it work every single time? Absolutely not. But on those days when I feel like I have nothing left to give, horizontal parenting reminds me that sometimes the best thing I can do for my kids is to show them that even grown-ups need rest—and that rest doesn’t mean we love them any less.
So go ahead, lie down on that carpet. Draw a racetrack on an old T-shirt. Let your kids turn you into a paper doll or a whack-a-mole target. Your back will thank you, your kids will remember these moments forever, and you’ll finally have found a way to parent that doesn’t require superhuman energy.
Because at the end of the day, being a good mom doesn’t mean being on your feet 24/7. Sometimes it means being flat on your back while your toddler rolls cars across your spine. And honestly? That’s pretty beautiful.