Do you ever have one of those moments where you realize you’ve been making parenting way harder than it needs to be? I had mine last Tuesday at dinner when my 7-year-old was pushing his food around his plate in complete silence, my 10-year-old was scrolling through something on her tablet, and I was desperately trying to start a conversation that didn’t involve screen time limits or homework.
That’s when I remembered something my sister-in-law mentioned at our last family gathering—would you rather questions for kids. I’ll be honest, I rolled my eyes at first. Another parenting “trick” that probably wouldn’t work with my crew. But desperate times called for desperate measures.
“Hey guys,” I said, putting down my fork. “Would you rather have the ability to fly or be invisible?”
The change was instant. My tablet-obsessed daughter looked up, my quiet son stopped picking at his dinner, and suddenly we had the most animated conversation we’d had in weeks. They argued (good-naturedly!) about which superpower would be better, shared what they’d do with each ability, and before I knew it, they were asking me questions back.
That’s when I realized I’d stumbled onto something pretty powerful—and I’m going to share everything I learned about using would you rather questions for kids to actually connect with our children.
What Makes Would You Rather Questions So Magical
After that breakthrough dinner conversation, I started researching why these simple questions work so well. Turns out, there’s actually science behind it. Child development experts explain that open-ended questions requiring children to make choices help develop critical thinking skills while giving parents insight into their child’s personality and thought processes.
The beauty of would you rather questions for kids is that they’re non-threatening. There’s no right or wrong answer, which means kids feel safe to express their genuine thoughts. Unlike asking “How was school today?” (which usually gets a grunt), these questions actually make kids think and want to share.
Child psychologists note that choice-based questions tap into kids’ natural desire for autonomy while still providing structure. It’s like giving them a voice without overwhelming them with completely open-ended questions they might not know how to answer.
The Age-by-Age Guide That Changed Everything
After my dinner table success, I started experimenting with different types of questions for my kids’ different ages and discovered something important: not all would-you-rather questions work for every age group.
Preschoolers (Ages 3-5): Keep It Simple and Concrete
For the little ones, stick to questions about things they can actually visualize:
- Would you rather have blue hair or green hair?
- Would you rather be a dog or a cat?
- Would you rather eat ice cream or cake?
- Would you rather play at a playground or go to the beach?
- Would you rather wear a superhero cape or a princess dress every day?
- Would you rather have a magic crayon that draws real things or a magic book that tells different stories?
My friend Sarah tried this with her 4-year-old, and she was amazed at how these simple questions revealed her daughter’s preferences and sparked longer conversations about why she made certain choices.
Elementary Age (Ages 6-10): Add Some Adventure
This is where you can start getting more creative and introduce hypothetical scenarios:
- Would you rather be able to talk to animals or read people’s minds?
- Would you rather live in a treehouse or underwater?
- Would you rather have super strength or super speed?
- Would you rather travel back in time or into the future?
- Would you rather discover a new planet or explore the deepest part of the ocean?
- Would you rather be able to control the weather or have the ability to heal any injury instantly?
These questions work because they tap into kids’ growing imagination while still being concrete enough for them to envision.
Tweens (Ages 11-13): Get Deeper and More Personal
Pre-teens love questions that let them explore their identity and values:
- Would you rather be the smartest person in school or the most popular?
- Would you rather be famous for something good or just live a normal, happy life?
- Would you rather have the ability to read minds or control time?
- Would you rather give up social media or TV for a year?
- Would you rather always know when someone is lying or never be able to lie yourself?
- Would you rather have unlimited money but no friends, or be poor but surrounded by people who love you?
The Categories That Actually Work (From a Real Mom’s Experience)
After months of trial and error, I’ve discovered that certain types of would you rather questions consistently work better than others. Here are my go-to categories that never fail to get conversations flowing:
Silly and Funny Questions
These are perfect for breaking the ice or lightening the mood:
- Would you rather have feet for hands or hands for feet?
- Would you rather sneeze glitter or burp confetti?
- Would you rather have to sing everything you say or dance everywhere you walk?
- Would you rather smell like cheese or have hair that changes color with your mood?
- Would you rather have spaghetti for hair or marshmallows for teeth?
- Would you rather sweat chocolate syrup or cry rainbow tears?
Superpower Questions
Kids absolutely love these because they tap into their natural desire to be special:
- Would you rather fly like Superman or be invisible like Wonder Woman’s jet?
- Would you rather control the weather or talk to animals?
- Would you rather have X-ray vision or super hearing?
- Would you rather teleport anywhere instantly or time-travel?
- Would you rather have the power to heal others or the power to never get sick yourself?
- Would you rather be able to breathe underwater or survive in space without a suit?
Food Questions
These work great because every kid has food preferences:
- Would you rather give up pizza forever or never eat ice cream again?
- Would you rather eat only sweet foods or only salty foods?
- Would you rather have unlimited cookies or unlimited candy?
- Would you rather cook every meal yourself or never cook again?
- Would you rather have taste buds in your hands or smell with your feet?
- Would you rather eat foods that are always too hot or always too cold?
Some of my favorite conversation starters for kids come from these food-related questions because they often lead to discussions about family traditions and memories.
Adventure and Travel Questions
Perfect for car rides or when you want to expand their worldview:
- Would you rather explore the bottom of the ocean or outer space?
- Would you rather visit 100 countries for one day each or live in one foreign country for a year?
- Would you rather camp in the wilderness or stay in a fancy hotel?
- Would you rather travel by helicopter or submarine?
- Would you rather climb the highest mountain or explore the deepest cave?
- Would you rather go on a safari in Africa or see the Northern Lights in Alaska?
When and Where to Use These Questions
One of the best things about Would You Rather questions for kids is their versatility. I’ve used them successfully in so many different situations:
Car Rides: Perfect for long trips or even short drives to school. They make the time fly by and create shared memories. Speaking of car entertainment, these work amazingly well alongside road trip games for kids.
Dinner Time: My original discovery! These questions transform quiet dinners into engaging family conversations. They’re especially helpful when you’re trying to get everyone to stay at the table a little longer.
Bedtime: A few gentle would you rather questions can be a great way to wind down and connect before sleep. I’ve found that slightly silly questions work best here to end the day on a positive note.
Waiting Rooms: Doctor’s offices, restaurants, or anywhere you need to keep kids occupied without screens. They’re a lifesaver during those unexpected delays.
Walking or Hiking: Makes the physical activity more engaging and passes the time quickly. My kids now associate our weekend walks with fun conversations rather than boring exercise.
Playdates: Great icebreakers for kids who don’t know each other well or need help starting conversations. They can reveal common interests and get shy kids talking.
Family Game Night: Mix them in between board games or use them as the main entertainment when you want something low-key but engaging.
75 Must-Try Would You Rather Questions for Kids
Based on my real-world testing with my own kids and feedback from other parents in my mom group, here are the questions that consistently work best:
For Younger Kids (Ages 4-7):
- Would you rather be able to jump as high as a kangaroo or swim as fast as a dolphin?
- Would you rather have a pet dinosaur or a pet dragon?
- Would you rather live in a castle or a spaceship?
- Would you rather it rain gummy bears or snow ice cream?
- Would you rather have wings like a bird or a tail like a monkey?
- Would you rather be as tiny as an ant or as big as an elephant?
- Would you rather slide down a rainbow or jump on clouds?
- Would you rather have magic shoes that make you run fast or magic socks that make you jump high?
- Would you rather be friends with a talking dog or a talking cat?
- Would you rather live where it’s always sunny or always snowy?
- Would you rather have a magic paintbrush that makes your drawings come to life or a magic microphone that makes you sing beautifully?
- Would you rather be able to turn into any animal or make any animal your best friend?
- Would you rather have a room full of LEGO or a room full of art supplies?
- Would you rather be able to make flowers grow instantly or make it rain whenever you want?
- Would you rather have a treehouse in your backyard or a swimming pool?
For Elementary Age (Ages 8-11):
- Would you rather be able to control fire or water?
- Would you rather discover a hidden treasure or discover a new planet?
- Would you rather be the best at sports or the smartest in school?
- Would you rather live without music or live without TV?
- Would you rather be able to breathe underwater or fly through the air?
- Would you rather have the chance to design a new toy or direct a movie?
- Would you rather live in the world of your favorite book or your favorite video game?
- Would you rather have a magic carpet or a magic wand?
- Would you rather never have to sleep or never have to eat?
- Would you rather be famous for being funny or famous for being brave?
- Would you rather have the ability to make anyone laugh or make anyone feel better when they’re sad?
- Would you rather be able to speak every language in the world or be able to play every musical instrument perfectly?
- Would you rather live in a world made of candy or a world where you could fly?
- Would you rather be able to communicate with plants or with machines?
- Would you rather have a photographic memory or be able to forget bad memories?
For Tweens (Ages 12+):
- Would you rather know what happens in your future or be able to change something from your past?
- Would you rather be really good at something you don’t enjoy or terrible at something you love?
- Would you rather have lots of acquaintances or just a few really close friends?
- Would you rather be able to speak every language in the world or be able to talk to animals?
- Would you rather live without the internet or live without air conditioning/heating?
- Would you rather be class president or the star of the school play?
- Would you rather always tell the truth or always be kind (even if it means bending the truth)?
- Would you rather be incredibly lucky or incredibly hardworking?
- Would you rather have perfect grades but no friends or average grades but amazing friendships?
- Would you rather be able to see 10 years into the future or travel back 10 years into the past?
Silly Questions (All Ages):
- Would you rather have spaghetti for hair or marshmallows for teeth?
- Would you rather sweat maple syrup or have tears that taste like chocolate?
- Would you rather have to wear a clown nose every day or clown shoes every day?
- Would you rather hiccup bubbles or sneeze confetti?
- Would you rather have a squeaky voice like a mouse or a deep voice like a bear?
- Would you rather have purple skin or green hair?
- Would you rather have to hop everywhere you go or crawl everywhere you go?
- Would you rather have fingers as long as legs or legs as short as fingers?
- Would you rather have to wear all your clothes backward or upside down?
- Would you rather speak in rhymes or sing everything you say?
Food-Related Questions:
- Would you rather eat pizza for every meal or never eat pizza again?
- Would you rather have taste buds in your hands or smell with your feet?
- Would you rather eat foods that are always too salty or always too sweet?
- Would you rather give up your favorite food for a year or eat only your favorite food for a month?
- Would you rather have vegetables that taste like candy or candy that’s as healthy as vegetables?
- Would you rather drink only water for the rest of your life or never drink water again?
- Would you rather eat ice cream with a fork or soup with your hands?
- Would you rather have unlimited pizza or unlimited ice cream for life?
- Would you rather cook dinner for your family every night or never have to clean up after meals?
- Would you rather eat only breakfast foods or only dinner foods for the rest of your life?
Adventure Questions:
- Would you rather explore a mysterious cave or climb the highest mountain?
- Would you rather go on a safari in Africa or scuba diving in the Great Barrier Reef?
- Would you rather travel to the past to meet dinosaurs or to the future to see flying cars?
- Would you rather be stranded on a tropical island or in a snowy mountain cabin?
- Would you rather be an astronaut or a deep-sea explorer?
- Would you rather discover Atlantis or find Bigfoot?
- Would you rather explore the Amazon rainforest or the Arctic tundra?
- Would you rather travel the world but never stay in one place longer than a week, or live in your dream location but never be able to leave?
- Would you rather go camping for a month or stay in luxury hotels for a week?
- Would you rather explore space or the deepest parts of the ocean?
Questions About Abilities:
- Would you rather remember everything you’ve ever learned or be able to forget bad memories?
- Would you rather be the fastest runner in the world or the smartest person in the world?
- Would you rather have perfect vision or perfect hearing?
- Would you rather be incredibly lucky or incredibly talented?
- Would you rather have the ability to heal others or the ability to never get hurt?
The Conversation Techniques That Actually Work
Here’s what I wish I’d known from the beginning: the magic isn’t just in the questions themselves, but in how you handle the responses. After several months of trial and error, I discovered some techniques that consistently lead to deeper, more meaningful conversations.
Follow Up With “Why”
Never just accept the answer and move on. The real connection happens when you ask follow-up questions:
- “That’s interesting! Why would you choose that?”
- “What would you do first if you had that ability?”
- “Have you ever thought about that before?”
- “What made you decide on that one?”
These follow-up questions often reveal the most about your child’s personality, fears, dreams, and current concerns.
Share Your Own Answer
Kids love hearing what adults think too. When you share your reasoning, it often prompts them to expand on their own thoughts or ask you follow-up questions. I’ve found that my kids are much more open when they see me participating genuinely rather than just asking questions.
Don’t Judge or Correct
Remember, there are no wrong answers. Even if your child chooses something that surprises you, use it as an opportunity to understand their thinking rather than guide them toward what you think is the “better” choice. This builds trust and keeps them sharing honestly.
Use Their Answers as Springboards
If your child says they’d rather be invisible, you might discover they’re feeling overlooked at school. If they choose super strength, they might be dealing with feeling powerless in some situations. These insights can lead to important conversations about what’s really going on in their lives.
Create a Judgment-Free Zone
Make it clear that there are no right or wrong answers, and that you’re genuinely curious about their thoughts. This encourages kids to be more creative and honest in their responses.
Creative Ways to Use Would You Rather Questions
Beyond just asking them out loud, I’ve discovered some fun variations that keep the game fresh:
Make It a Game Show
Set up your living room like a game show, complete with a “host” (rotating family members) and maybe even small prizes for participation (not for being “right”—remember, there are no wrong answers!). My kids love taking turns being the host and coming up with their own questions.
Create Categories
Like I mentioned in my experience with easy trivia questions for kids, having themed rounds keeps things interesting. Try having a “silly round,” an “adventure round,” and a “serious round.”
Draw or Act Out Answers
For visual or kinesthetic learners, have kids draw their choices or act them out. This works especially well with younger children and can lead to hilarious family moments.
Make It Educational
Tie questions into what they’re learning at school. If they’re studying the ocean, ask ocean-themed questions. If it’s history month, create historical scenarios. This reinforces learning while keeping it fun.
Use Props
Sometimes I’ll use toys, pictures, or even costumes to make the scenarios more real. This is particularly effective with younger kids and adds an element of dramatic play.
Write Questions Down
Let older kids write their own Would You Rather questions for the family. You’ll be surprised at their creativity and what they come up with!
The Mistakes I Made (So You Don’t Have To)
Let me save you some trial and error by sharing the mistakes I made when I first started using Would You Rather questions for kids:
Mistake #1: Making Questions Too Complex
I initially tried questions like “Would you rather live in a world where everyone was equal but there was no individual achievement, or a world where people could excel but there was inequality?” My 8-year-old just stared at me. Keep it age-appropriate!
Mistake #2: Turning It Into a Teaching Moment
When my daughter said she’d rather be popular than smart, my first instinct was to explain why intelligence is more important. Don’t do this! These questions are for connection and understanding, not correction.
Mistake #3: Using Them as Discipline Tools
I once tried asking, “Would you rather do your homework now or lose screen time?” This backfired spectacularly because it turned the fun game into a parenting lecture.
Mistake #4: Not Being Patient
Some kids need time to think. Don’t rush them or fill the silence. Let them process and come up with their answer naturally. The thinking time is often just as valuable as the answer itself.
Mistake #5: Making It Competitive
I briefly tried voting on answers or declaring winners. This completely missed the point and made some kids hesitant to share their real thoughts.
Mistake #6: Only Using Them When Bored
These questions work best as a regular part of family interaction, not just emergency entertainment. Make them part of your routine.
Building on the Success
Once would you rather questions a regular part of your family routine, you’ll probably find yourself naturally expanding into other engaging activities. In our house, these questions led to more creative games like scavenger hunt ideas for kids and even inspired us to create our own house rules for kids based on the values discussions that came up.
The conversations that stem from these questions often reveal what your kids are thinking about, worrying about, or excited about. Use these insights to plan other activities, choose books together, or simply to better understand your child’s world.
Making It a Family Tradition
Six months after that first successful dinner conversation, would you rather questions have become such a natural part of our family dynamic that my kids now ask them to each other and even to me. Last week, my 7-year-old asked me, “Mom, would you rather clean the house or play with us?” (The answer was easy, but it led to a great conversation about balance and priorities.)
What started as a desperate attempt to get my kids talking has become something we all genuinely look forward to. These questions have given us insights into each other’s personalities, created inside jokes, and provided a screen-free way to connect that actually works.
The best part? They’re completely free, require zero preparation, and work anywhere. Whether you’re dealing with a quiet car ride, an awkward dinner, or just want to connect with your child, would you rather questions for kids are a parenting tool that actually delivers on its promise.
Beyond the Questions: Building Real Connection
The real magic of Would You Rather questions isn’t just in the entertainment value—it’s in what happens next. These conversations have opened doors to discussions about my kids’ hopes, fears, friendships, and dreams that I never would have accessed otherwise.
When my daughter consistently chose options that involved helping others, it led to conversations about empathy and eventually to her volunteering to help younger kids at school. When my son kept choosing adventure-related options, we planned more outdoor activities and discovered his love for hiking.
Pay attention to patterns in your child’s answers. Do they always choose the brave option? The funny option? The helpful option? These patterns can give you incredible insight into their personality and values.
The Long-Term Impact
It’s been almost a year since I first discovered the power of would you rather questions for kids, and the impact has been profound. My children are more comfortable sharing their thoughts with me, more willing to engage in family conversations, and more creative in their thinking.
These simple questions taught me to listen without judgment, to value my children’s perspectives, and to find joy in their unique ways of seeing the world. They’ve made us closer as a family and given us a reliable way to connect, no matter what else is going on in our busy lives.
So the next time you’re struggling to connect with your child, remember that sometimes the simplest approaches work best. Start with just one question, be genuinely curious about their answer, and prepare to be surprised by what you learn about the amazing little person sitting across from you.
The most beautiful part? Every question you ask shows your child that their thoughts matter, their opinions are valued, and their imagination is worth exploring. In a world full of screens and distractions, would you ratherquestions offer something irreplaceable: genuine human connection, one curious question at a time.
FAQs
At what age should I start asking Would you rather questions to my child?
You can start as early as 3-4 years old with very simple, concrete questions like “Would you rather have blue hair or red hair?” The key is keeping questions age-appropriate and using concepts they can easily visualize and understand.
How can I make Would You Rather questions educational?
Tie questions to what your child is learning in school or areas you want them to think about. For example, if they’re studying animals, ask, “Would you rather live in the Arctic like a polar bear or in the jungle like a monkey?” This reinforces learning while keeping it fun.
What should I do if my child can’t decide between the two options?
That’s totally normal! You can either give them more time to think, help them talk through each option, or simply say, “It’s okay to say both sound good” and move on to another question. Don’t pressure them to choose.
Are there any Would You Rather questions I should avoid?
Avoid questions that could cause anxiety (like scary scenarios), questions about family dynamics that might feel uncomfortable, or anything that feels like a test with a “right” answer. Keep them fun, safe, and judgment-free.
How often should I ask these questions to keep them interesting?
There’s no magic number, but I’ve found that using them 2-3 times per week keeps them special without becoming routine. Mix up when and where you use them – sometimes at dinner, sometimes in the car, sometimes at bedtime – to maintain their novelty and effectiveness.